So here we are. Almost 15 months on and im finally blogging about Eden in SCN. Better late than never hey?
I have decided that i will blog this like a dairy,day by day, and ill chuck some stuff in from my actual diary that I kept at the time.
I might break it up into 2 parts as well, and a huge pat on the back if you manage to get through both!
I have wanted to blog this for ages, not just for you but for eden too. I love the idea that someday i can go, “look kids, heres my blog starting from 2005!” But anyway, I digress…
20/1/2010 Eden Elizabeth arrives . You can read about her birth below this post!
21/1/2010 Day 1
“woken up every 2 hours for stats. Wake up at about 6am, the nurse tells me that there was an abruption, and a 300ml clot. She tells me “you were very lucky” After I see the doctors etc, get unconnected from everything, shower ( most humiliating moment of my life? being towel dried by a 18 yr old nurse, mumbling sorry about my legs, I thought I had 6 weeks to shave them) I am taken to SCN. Eden is in the 3rd humidicrib,attached to a drip, on oxygen, a tiny scar on her cheek from the Cesar. Im afraid to even touch her.”
I started expressing that day, into a syringe. Eden is having 3mls every 2 hours, through the NG tube.
I was woken up at 1:10am, for my first cuddle. Eden is almost 29 hours old. I cry.10 amazing minutes.
Then i get to feed her through the NG tube for the first time. Cry again.
22/1/2010 Day 2
“Oxygen off, increasing feeds.Caffeine has been started for apnoeas, she has had a few, forgetting to breathe Im told. Kangaroo cuddle for half an hour, and yes, cried. again. Told Bean tonight so many people are praying for her. Also got to change my first nappy! whod have though id be thrilled by a nappy change ! Eden has such a tiny froggy bottom, her nappies are newborn, folded in half, still hanging off her!
23/1/2010 Day 3
“Im sent home with my giftbag and my orange breastmilk labels. But no baby.I scour the town for a breastpump, and after hysterically crying at the 4th shop, I get a staff discount.(and it was still $200!) We go home, i eat, express, and despite not being allowed to drive for 6 weeks, i drive back to the hospital . When I finally get home again at about 11:30pm, I collapse in tears.
We live about 35 minutes away from the hospital, The drive is okay, mainly on the highway , only horrible when you get into town, living in the country gives me no patience for traffic lights.
24/1/2010 day 4
Bean keeps slipping out of her ID bands. Lynn put a new set on her today, so the old set has gone onto my camera bag, and onto pink dolly. She was started on Iron today, and Pentavite.. Simon came up today and had his second cuddle-the first being when she was born, he arrived back at the hospital to a new daughter and a doped up wife. I am jealous he got top hold her first, and hate that I missed the first 14 or so hours of her life. Hate that I didnt see her enter the world. Today is the worst day, crying in the nurses arms.
Also, this morning when the kids started back at school (with no books because I had to spend the book money on a breastpump and tanks of fuel) the principal told me that the school had gotten Dakota, Rani and Jais books, and to pay for them ‘whenever we are able’ . So Im sure that impressed the kids/parents, a hysterical woman sobbing her thanks to the teachers. People are really astounding me with kindness, i am forever grateful.
* I think moving here, getting the kids into this little country school ( they are in classes of about 13 compared to over 30 at their previous school) was one of the best decisions we ever made. People here just embraced us with love and assistance wholeheartedly.
25/1/2010 Day 5
Starting to get yellow.When i go up that night,she is under double lights for jaundice.
26/1/2010 Day 6
Australia Day. And the highlight is the free parking!!! Woo hoo!! When I see Eden, I decide today is ‘Day of the funky glasses’
Watching mothers come and go, I am happy for them, but jealous it isnt us.
The drive home has turned into therapy of sorts. After those first few days, I cheer myself up on the night drives home by blasting Britney Spears and Lady Gaga.
Man, I used to get so excited when the Carpark Full sign wasnt out! Like, pathetically excited. “ YES!!! YES!!! SWEET!!!”
27/1/2010 Day 7
1 week old today. Tolerating 32mls of breastmilk nicely, only throwing up her milk with the Pentavite in it. Doctors see her at lunchtime ( oooh sexy Dr Alberto- he makes all the nurses giggly) and decide to leave the lights off.
Day by day.
1 week down.
28/1/2010 Day 8
When I get to the hospital, I nearly walk past her. She is clean! She had her first spongedown at 2:30am, and was weighed for the second time. She is 1.77kgs ( 4 pounds)
29/1/2010 Day 9
Eden has lost another 20g.
At 6:15pm tonight, I was able to breastfeed for the first time. It took her a while , but she had about 15 minutes worth.
yes, again, cried. actually, sobbed.
30/1/2010 Day 10
Routine…
up,express,hospital,home,express,hospital,home,sleep.
Repeat daily
31/1/2010 Day 10
When I call SCN (every morning between 6 and 7) I am told Bean had a bottle!
She is still holding at 1750g, so fortifier has been started.
1/2/2010 Day 12
Bean gained 60g. Porker:)
2/2/2010 Day 13
Just another day (with two breastfeeds!!) when Debra announces its time for an open cot!Of course , all the gorgeous clothes I bought for her are miles too big, so she is dressed in scratchy ugly hospital clothes. But hey… OPEN COT!!!!!!
She has gained another 60g, and today was her last apnoea.
On the way home, I hit the shops, and buy 5 miniscule outfits and a jumper for a teddy bear that fits her perfectly! I love shopping but it feels so wrong to be shopping without her, shes not safe inside me and i dont have her in my arms.
you know, 13 is my lucky number!
Well, there, halfway done,stay tuned for part 2!